Why bus travel makes me jump with joy

Waiting for a bus seems a harmless enough thing to do. I just have to simply ignore the men looking me up and down, sizing my body up. Visually raping me just because I have something that they don't. Oh, but of course I can't say anything. Because I'm public property after all. It gets worse when I step into the bus. Men brushing against me casually as if their birth right. The funny thing is though the bus has an equal number of men and women, the women don't fall onto the women or the wolves nor do the men fall onto the other men. It's as if we are all a magnet for testosterone. I'm not even that pretty for anyone to give me more than three seconds worth,but it's simply that I'm different in subtle ways.The conductor takes forever to hand over the change resting his hands for however long he pleases.
Then there are things which are so simple but hold the same levels of irritation. I'm not asking that the honourable species who rest their asses to behave like gentlemen and give up their seats for the minority clan. But hell, even though 33% reservation hasn't been fully carried out in buses, 4 seats are reserved for us. You aren't worthy enough to sit there and when I tell you to get up, I don't expect you to look me in the eye and talk like a smart ass. I don't care if you've slogged the whole day. A lot of us have too and its nice to claim the little of the territory that belongs to us. But hey, I'm following the rules. So I must be put behind bars. Frankly, my voice has faded. All I want to do is to castrate you and feed you to the street dogs. Because this land is forbidden. But of course you can't understand that. The logic is too complicated to feed into your pea-sized brain.
I don't want to hear an irritating tune being hummed from your whiskey covered lips, that too when you sit and I'm holding on to dear life. You must at least have the fucking courtesy to get up when a pregnant woman or a grand mother stands near you, instead of pointedly staring at your phone and showing off your worthless ring tones. You shouldn't expect us to ask it, because you're not the bloody king.
Maybe, just maybe if I cover myself up totally, roll myself on excrement and get onto a bus, I could repel the blue bloods. But it's a big maybe. Well, anyway I'm treated like shit, so I thought this would help. Excuses. For being like this. It's not my fault I was born a women, but hey, I didn't ask to make it your business either.
I accept I'm cowardly to not stand up and fight for my voice to be heard. But when I do,you shout me down and no one comes to continue the thread and you're a man after all. And apart from the insults, I'm also given advice. I'm supposedly too forward and too outgoing to make comments like this in public. So I'm asked to shut up and behave a "woman". Whatever the hell that means.
These incidents have at least made me realize the meaning of the expression "be a man". Yes loser, because its so humiliating to be a woman. Its one of the worst insults you can hand out to a man. Because only his manliness makes up his personality. Just like being fair and voluptuous and having smooth skin makes up a woman. Forget about character and other things that old men talked about. Totally not important. I'm truly sorry if I've ever used it in the past.

So to all of you suckers out there, please get a life and don't forget to get lost.

Highly Viscous

A glimpse of whatever can resemble a liquid's state
A reflection turns into a shadow
Smiling at me from the other side of the gears,
Inquiring about mundane answers posing as questions
The mind probes into raw data
Turning over and over, the rush of memories
Whys and hows fixing me with a witch's glare
Confusion I see, everywhere
I have to face the crowd's judgment,
revving up seemingly angry but all smiles within
After all I'm bargaining for his life as my own for:
we're very different yet so similar as the waves in an ocean

The bearings of my life have got nothing to say
I'll wait a million eternities just to see you again
I may not be deserving of you now, but
give me a few seconds out of the eons that He grants
I will build on whatever I see fit
Walking everywhere, all I see is you
Just as you came up to me before we parted ways

Heads we win, tails we still win
Tortured by geography, yet on the same brown plain
Fixed by destiny, we'll meet someday
My nameless prince, my very own, the drive in my life

Life is to be lived

The act is finalized, the tricks laid out prettily on the table. The beautiful assistant flashes you her most winning smile and the crowd keeps you going. Spotting a few people here and there in the meaningless babble, you wave to keep the rhythm going. The lights then dim and your shadow now follows you. Then everything goes wrong.
The props aren't right, the trick is a disaster, your friend in the audience is no longer on-board and the people's mutters rev up like some machine about to mince meat. But what you miss most is the applause. Your soul is gone. Where to find solace now that you found out that everything was a huge mistake? Whom to turn to for help when you know that nobody cares? Your troubles seem to swell up, tears daring each other to break away from your eyes. You want to scream but the audience took your voice away with them.
No friend, no lover. No one but you. One man battles are not unheard of, but what for are you fighting?
Glory? It was never there to begin with.
Love? That too.
Yourself? It will never be the same again.
So what? In some smelly, unattended, rat-infested corner of this huge world, you might just find it. Pure and crying to be rejuvenated. The jagged edges will bear witness to your rough sail, but polish it you can. Don't lose it again lest you become a nameless speck of dust with a mundane existence with the might of the universe behind you; ready to swallow you at the slightest imbalance.

Gut wrenching crap

You wake up everyday,drag yourself all the way to the shower and groan it out during breakfast. Chewing on a piece of bread like a cow on cud, you finish 2 slices after eternity. Then comes the coffee. Its either too black or too weak and never just right. You try to do something but boredom creeps its way in and throttles you till its time for lunch. 2 hours later, you're too sleepy to be doing anything and nap it up. When its time to get up, half the day is gone, but there's still time for that "coffee" you love. Finishing it in one giant gulp, you start your work. There's a significant amount done before dinner is announced and as is with meals, you're first at the table. That over, you sweat out more than you had bargained for that day finishing it off at around 2 am, all the while gritting your teeth over irritating matters of no importance that seemed very life threatening at that time.
Baring your fangs(sorry teeth), lashing out at the phone or anything handy enough to be thrown at the innocent smile of a 3-year old kid who stares back at you as if every damn thing in his perfect world is fine. You start hurling abuses at that mad kid in the poster, at your computer screen, at the dumb freecell game that you couldn't win and thus brought up the lost streak count to 12. Even the usually not-so-funny forwards seemed very insulting and the usual do-till-i-die hobby of messaging has lost its fun. Oh, it so has. And when people don't realize this, it sparks a something. Medieval-like in its battle spirit and as immature as that kid you hate, it crops up. And that feeling of having defeated someone in a verbal matter is so soothing to that monster inside you.
It controls you in the heat of passion and in the dourest of times. Like it? Just love it. Hate it? More than the slimiest anthropod. Can't live with it, can't live without. Looking back on it all, do not blame it on "situation","circumstance" or "hormones". Deal with it, its the monster YOU created by channelling all that you hated into one massive black hole. Its upto you to warp its dimensions, cut its fangs, suck out the poison, fix up a smile and face the world.Who knows, yours maybe a cute cat compared to someone else's dragon. And you know what they say, never tickle a sleeping dragon.